The heat is on...

I like to think of myself as a strong, hardy, independent person. At the age of 12 I would beam with pride when called stubborn. I was downright giddy that my parents had a book in their library entitled The Strong Willed Child. As I got a little older and my worldview grew less myopic, the harsh reality of my limitations and inferiorities came crashing down. Losing championship games, not making the grade I expected, actually confronting failure - ouch. But I did manage to dust myself off and move on - most of the time capturing some positive essential from the experience. There is however a little piece of me that is still an obstinate and overly- sure 10 year old, and boy did it come out this week.

June in St. Louis got off to a hot, hot, hot and mighty humid start. No bother for the strong and capable me. 108 lbs of sheer force and will, I woke up Monday morning absolutely sure I could tackle this weather, any time of day, with aplomb. Well - not even close. I withered and withered and withered some more, and by Saturday, when I finally ran at a reasonable time for the heat, I just couldn’t make it more than 4 miles of my scheduled 8. I limped home - tail between the legs - slumped on the couch and felt sorry for myself and my lack of fitness, wallowed away for an hour or so wondering if I’m just too old to keep up and how in the world I would ever make 50 miles if I could barely scrape out 4. Eventually I decided to just zip the brains negativity and go have fun. It worked! I woke up Sunday morning, humbled and ready to tackle a 14 mile run - weather be damned. I took it easy, ran well within my comfort zone and finally, somewhere around mile 8, I began to feel like me again knocking the last 6 out of the park with some decent speed.

14 miles - not that big of a deal. I run that distance 2-3 times a week while marathon training, but 14 miles after a week of getting my esteem chomped up = priceless. And I relearned, which I think I have to every year, to be smart about running in the heat. It accumulates on your body and taxes you in a way that running in mild temperatures just does not. I tend to get into a zone when the weather warms up in the spring and I am running well - where I think I can do anything - run Badwater 135 miles in the searing heat, no problem - Leadville, I could do that in my sleep - Sahara 1 week across the desert run, without a blink - and then my reality sets in, brings me back to earth, smacks me around and helps to center me back on my own realistic goals. It stings every time, and every time I come away with a little more knowledge of myself. So while I wouldn’t call this week a good running week - it sure was a positive self examination week, and I’m hoping that I can cater my goals to the reality of my body and it’s limitations in a way that keeps me satisfied within but still reaching just beyond the line.

Miles run = 49 +1.5 hour swimming 2 hour resistance training/yoga